Tuesday, 1 July 2008

Wiped Out

All right, as fun and instructive as it's been to be a figurative non-bum-wiper, I have to fess up and say that I actually HAVE been able to wipe my own ass throughout this ordeal. During the time when I wouldn't have been able to, the drugs they had me on had me puckered up tighter than a Cat 5 going through turn 5 at Reston, which was convenient. Maybe more than you needed to know. Anyhow, in Big Daddy when the kid is trying to convince Adam Sandler that he should keep him, the kid says "but I can wipe my own ass!" Given my late state of (somewhat in-)complete physical unfeasibility, I felt it a charming contrast to my own situation.

Exhibit A: Dara Torres, 41 year old mother of 1, on a quest to make her 5th Olympic Swimming Team. Mein Gott!
NY Times

Thassa little bit scary, wouldn't ya say? She's farkin' ripped.

Oh yeah, I can ride bikes again. That's right, I am a master of the exercycle. I made it through a full half hour on that sucker this evening. Tomorrow, my knee will either experience fluid movement the likes of which it has not seen since mid May, or it will be so wracked with pain and stiffness that I will be bed ridden. Which will it be?

My Kiwi muscles are so insane right now, and we're headed to the beach this weekend where I'm sure they will reach an absolute peak. The merits of proper base building.

When did you all develop man crushes on Lance Lacy? He even kind of has a porn star sounding name. I say you run with it, BROTHER!


Kyle Jones said...

I personally have an excuse that I ride with the fool about 2-3 times a week and like to give him shit. That older lady is really hot.

TCR James said...

Kyle, head bag it.

She's what your boy Bryan calls a "butterface."

BTW, the first sentence is an anagram of 'Kyle the gay bike lad.'

Ps. I think she's really attractive, stonkin' amazing athletic ability is an attractive thing, but she could probably stand to eat everything on her plates. There's bicyclists starving in Girona, you know. I only put that first sentence in there so's I could write "Kyle the gay bike lad." GayRacer would be *so* into the idea of you liking the vaguely masculine lookin' girls. Wait a minute, did I say she's "vaguely" masculine looking? Ha ha ha.