Monday, 11 February 2008

Eye Popping Speed

Kanye West is an idiot. His speech ran on too long, so they played the "wrap it up" music. "Aw HELL no, I'm WAY too important to be shuffled off stage" - so more Kanye. And more Kanye. And more. And then he starts talking about his recently deceased mother. "I think it would be in good taste for you to stop the music now" - and more Kanye. I'm sorry your mother died. She died having a totally elective bit of plastic surgery - one of many such procedures which she'd had. It's a tragedy for any person to lose a parent, but this is not the stuff of martyrdom. But hey, more Kanye. I'm not sure but I think the song which was being feted was the one that is an absolute note for note line for line rip-off of the Daft Punk song - you know the one on which he abjectly neglected to mention Daft Punk in the credits or anything? Not that I'm a Daft Punk fan (rather, I am occasionally held hostage to them in long car trips), but they wrote the song. Crap, I sing weird funny words to songs all the time. There are many people who, to this day, fall over dying with laughter when the words "oh please don't put that tortilla in my cooter" are sung to the tune of Billy Joel's "Downeaster Alexa." I thought I'd heard that the reason Billy Joel and Christie Brinkley got divorced was that he had some weird sexual food fetish. We were drinking Kialoas at Maddy's (now talk about a tragic demise - that place was the tits) in Marblehead, it was tres droll. But I have no Grammy on the shelf to keep my 3rd place trophy from Union Grove company, do I? And hell, when I win Poolesville this year and they turn on the music and try to cut my acceptance speech short, I probably WILL wrap it up and get off stage.

Apart from that, I'm a total alcoholic. Fairly low grade, but dedicated. My supposed caloric expenditure on the highways and byways this weekend was on the order of 4000, which I easily surpassed with beer intake. Damn.

Oh yeah, and I was watching the Grammys because a friend works for XM and needed to produce some thing on it, so we all watched it. I have well and truly zippy interest in anything that went on last night, except that Herbie Hancock winning was pretty cool. "Rock It" is probably the greatest video of all time, and The Headhunters is easily top 5 all time record material.

Off to do some nasty ninja style yoga. Namaste.

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